Friday, July 30, 2010

Remembrance of Gene: Dr. Alberto Ochoa

Dr. Alberto Ochoa was a colleague, professional collaborator and friend of Gene’s. They’d worked together recently on a project to prepare teachers who would have expertise in both Special Education, and in meeting the needs of students and families from linguistically and culturally diverse backgrounds. This project was similar in some very important ways to the work that first brought us to San Diego, seventeen years ago, and was Gene’s professional passion. Alberto visited Gene regularly at the hospital, helping him to stay in touch with his professional life, while still nurturing their personal relationship. He has been a tremendous support to us both. I’m so glad to have the opportunity to revisit his words.


Thank you for the opportunity to celebrate the life of our colleague Dr. Eugeñio Calderon Valles. I first met Gene upon his arrival at SDSU almost 17 years ago and had the privilege to interact with him almost on a weekly basis during the last three years of his life--- at a personal, professional, as co-director of a federally funded dual credential project in biliteracy and Special Ed/MM—named ALAS (Acquisition of Language & Academic Skills)/, as well as interacting with Gene in community advocacy activities involving Special Education in the San Diego Unified Schools District. Reflecting on my interactions with Gene in the last three years….I learned much from him –to listen, to be patient, and to strive to be caring.

At a personal level, I deeply appreciated our conversations as we met regularly at the Starbucks near Hwy 163 & Friars, often Karen Cadiero-Kaplan would join us, to coordinate our work. Before entering into matters of the ALAS Project we would share “una urgente taza de café”--an urgent cup of coffee-- and share events about our lives-past-present-future plans. In our conversations, he would often speak about his love for New Mexico and his ranch, about the adventures of his 97 year old father, about the work of his wife Gail, about social and educational concerns in our society at the macro and micro levels. It was a way for us to connect with our lives, our roots, and our work. In our deliberations, he would always emphasize the importance of honesty, fairness, and compassion in working to improve the social conditions of our communities and our democratic system of government.

At a professional level, we had long dialogues on pedagogical issues that could make a difference in addressing the existing achievement gap in our urban school communities. As we discussed ways to bridge the field of biliteracy and special education in the preparation of teachers—he always wanted to focus on the application of concepts by focusing on various types of learners and in the case of ethnolinguistic learners—the relevancy, efficiency, and effectiveness of instructional practices in our schools.

As a co-director of the ALAS project, I learned about his passion and his dream, namely, of bridging two departments, philosophically, a socio-constructivist pedagogy and behaviorist pedagogy, in the preparation of biliterate special education mild-moderate teachers. His passion and ideas became a reality with the funding of a 5 year project to prepare such educators in our local communities. With his departure, we are now seeking the help and support of Drs. Ann Graves, Karen Cadiero-Kaplan, and Regina Brandon to fulfill Gene’s dream of making this project part of our ongoing teacher preparation option in the College of Education.

As an activist, in his work with SDUSD, Gene approached issues of equity with thoughtfulness, reflection and humanity—always from a proactive approach and seeking to work with and through the educational system—always advocating for access, fairness, and educational practices that were not deficit based. His voice and advocacy will be missed!

Reflecting on this journey in the last 6 months, of importance to me, is that both Gene and his wife Gail have taught us much about being courageous in the midst of uncertainty and chaos. Upon hearing of Gene’s departure from us……I wrote to Gail and said: I received the news with extreme pain in my heart...yet, I will always remember Gene as a gentle, charismatic, thoughtful, giving and caring person and educator who mentored many. At a personal level, I sought to interact with Gene for his simplicity, personal manner in dealing with those around him, and as a scholar who was deeply committed to teach, to mentor and to develop teachers.

Gene cared much about his students, preparing detailed teaching lessons that guided students to discover their voice, ontological vocation, and the art of teaching children/youth with special needs. In the words of one of our ALAS graduates: “Dr. Valles taught us to empower our students whose voices are quiet and difficult to hear. It is our responsibility to make sure they are heard”. As previously stated, ALAS was a project created to actualize his dream of bridging the fields of biliteracy with special education while centering on ethnolinguistc students.Como guerrero, as a warrior, I know that Gene in his last few months of life was suffering and was searching to reconcile his personal spiritual freedom and overcoming physical pain. Yet, at this very moment, through Pablo Neruda’s poem (Pido Silencio/I Ask for Silence) …Gene speaks to us:

"Pido silencio ..... me voy a cerrar mis ojos .... he vivido con tanta intensidad que un dia tendran que olvidarse de mi. Pero ¿por qué pido silencio?....no pienses que yo voy a morir, por el contrario: sucede que voy a volver a vivir. Ocurre que nunca me sentí tan vivo, nunca he tenido tantos besos .... Ahora, como siempre es temprano. Y la luz del día principia con el vuelo de las abejas ... Les pido estar solo con el día ...... y pedir permiso para nacer"—I ask permission to be born .

"I ask for silence ..... I am going to close my eyes .... I have lived with such intensity that one day you will have to forget me. But why do I ask for silence, do not think that I am going to die, on the contrary: it happens that I will re-live. It happens that I never felt so alive, I never had so many kisses .... Now, as always it is early. The light of day appears with the fly of bees ... I ask to be alone with the day ...... and ask permission to be born.

In closing, in the power of the spiritual agreements found in the indigenous Toltec culture, I will continue hear Gene’s voice speaking to students and to each of us who were fortunate to know him: “to always do our best, “to not make assumptions as we interact with people different from us”, and to strive to be “impeccable with our word”…ser impecable con nuestra palabra.

Gail…with deep respect and affection, con respeto y cariño Alberto Ochoa

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Remembrance of Gene: Jose Luis Alvarado

Dr. Jose Luis Alvarado shared his reflection at Gene's SDSU Memorial from the perspective of friend and colleague in the Department of Special Education. Gene and Jose Luis grew together professionally and personally from both the common bonds they shared and the opportunities they had to spend time together learning from each other, getting to know each other and supporting each other. I know that Gene's voice is with Jose Luis, as it is with me, and that he will be continuing to guide and support him from the other side. Keep your boys facile with that frisbee, Jose Luis!

Gene Valles

Colleague and Friend

By

Jose Luis Alvarado

First, I’d like to say that Gene would not approve of what I am wearing today. For Gene, being dressed for work was a button down, short-sleeved shirt, a tie, his Wrangler blue jeans, and his boots. For special occasions, he’d wear black Wrangler jeans.

In honor of Gene’s request, I will do my best to keep it simple.

For us as Gene’s Colleagues, he was first and foremost, a teacher, a master teacher of teachers…, he was also a Frisbee playing buddy, a mentor, the voice of reason, collaborator, counselor but most importantly, he was a great friend. Though I am here to share as a colleague, I first met Gene when I was a student in the special education credential program. From the first day, he told us, don’t call me “Dr. Valles,” just call me “Gene.” Gene would drive out to the Valley to teach a class for the first cohort of SPED Teachers being trained out there. We connected right away and continued our friendship as we both were involved with COMRISE (Center of Minority Research in Special Education), he as a post doctoral research fellow and I as a doctoral student. We developed many close common friendships: Dr. Todd Fletcher, Dr. Alfredo Artiles, Dr. Phil Chin…all who were deeply saddened of Gene’s passing and each send their condolences to the family.

I recall the time when I applied for a faculty position here at SDSU, as Gene was driving me to the interview, he asked, “Are you sure this is what you want?” as if to say, “do you really know what you are getting into buddy???” Many times since, he would remind me that he tried to warn me but I did not listen. As a colleague, Gene was always the voice of reason…he wouldn’t speak much sometimes, but when he spoke, it was with a purpose. Gene had a special way of refocusing our department discussions. If we were having discussions about policy or curriculum, he would always keep us grounded by asking, “How is this good for kids? How is this good for teachers?”

As a colleague, Gene was a generous individual who did not hesitate to share of his curricular materials as many of us were doing new preps. As stressful as the promotion and tenure process is, Gene would go out of his way to helping many of us improve our RTP materials. We want to thank him for the countless hours he spent editing our candidate statements. Gracias Gene, we owe much to you.

Gene always kept his door open and students and colleagues alike dropped by frequently. Of course, one consequence of his open door policy was the backing up of papers to grade. I would tell him, “Gene, these are final papers, students are not going to read your comments.” That did not deter him, he would respond, “I know, but I need to give them feedback.” He always strived to make all of his students the best teachers they could be.

For me, it didn’t matter when I would stop by, he was always glad to see me. “Q-Vole Jose Luis, pasale. Have a seat” , was Gene’s typical greeting. For many of us in the Special Education Department, Gene was like an older brother. He always had great advice but he was an even better listener. Like a cool older brother, he was one heck of a fun guy to have a beer with. In fact, several SPED Dept. faculty can say that they had their first beer in San Diego compliments of Gene.

I cannot believe that my good friend and colleague Gene Valles is physically gone. I know that his legacy and impact in the education community will carry on. I know that a part of Gene will continue to live on in me, in all of us really. Still, as I walk the corridor in the basement floor of the North Education building, I still instinctually look over hoping to see Gene’s door open…and if the door was open, Gene was either letting a student make up an exam or just chatting it up. If his door was open and he wasn’t in his office, he was probably visiting Paul probably conspiring on their next escapade. I am, we all are, going to miss our good friend and colleague, Gene Valles.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Marie's Prayer For Gene, and For Us

Dr. Marie Schrup was the first speaker at Gene's SDSU Memorial, after Dr. Ric Hovda's welcome, the Dean of the College of Education. Gene and Marie had been colleagues and friends since we first came to San Diego. Marie visited often in the hospital, and tried to support us both in any possible way, including making sure the chocolate stash was available for whomever might need it, even when Gene could no longer himself enjoy it. Towards the latter part of our difficult journey, Marie began to write prayers for us that provided comfort to us both. I asked her if she'd be comfortable offering a prayer to begin the Memorial. Although this was more of a professional memorial, our journey did bring us closer to God, and that needed to be reflected. Gratefully, she agreed. Here are her words:

I initially met Gene when I did policy work in Special Education in the 90s. I knew him the whole time he was at SDSU. He quickly became a professional and personal friend.
Gene passed away shortly after Summer Solstice, the day of greatest light. Having met a remarkable person in Gene, having listened to him, I understand myself in a new way, I experience the world in a different light.
Summer is a season of appreciating abundance of light, the reality of both the physical light and the spiritual light, and of recognizing the unique gifts we have to share with the world.

Please join me in a prayer/meditation.

Divine Beloved, Heavenly Father, God of faithfulness,

In your wisdom, You have called Your servant Gene out of this world; welcome him into Your Presence, so that he may enjoy eternal light and peace.

How remarkable is the mystery of Creation and the interconnectedness of all things. We are all here today to celebrate Gene as we are connected to him and to each other in so many different ways. Thank you for the gift of his life. Hear our prayers for Gene whom You have called from this life to Yourself.

Help us all be more aware of all of life around us and live life with more love, humor, compassion, wisdom and kindness. Whenever there is something that we should pay particular attention to, help us feel the strong loving presence of our Guardian angel, whoever that might be to us. As we meet and think of people today help us remember that every thought is a prayer.

We never know what place we may have in helping another heal so help us to have a peaceful mind and compassionate heart with all those we encounter. Give us the grace to accept what comes our way.

Thank you for your guidance as each of us goes forward with Gene in our hearts. I believe everyone has been created with a purpose in life and that as long as we listen You will lead us to that purpose as You did for Gene.

Take care of Gene as only You can do. Look with love on those who mourn. We miss him dearly. I ask all this in your precious name,
Amen.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

One Month

Seems like it has been a week and that I should be updating the blog. The San Diego Memorial was as incredible in its way as was the New Mexico one. It too included family and friends, and the added gift was being able to hear from Gene’s colleagues and students, to have that element of his professional life reflected. He tended to keep the two sides of his life somewhat separate, and we were fortunate to hear from a few of the people with whom Gene enjoyed mixing the personal and professional dimensions of his life. Over the next few days, as I get permissions from those who spoke, I’ll be posting their reflections.

The Dean’s Office, and Marilyn Bredvold and Jose Luis Alvarado in particular, were so supportive and so helpful in pulling off the event. It was incredibly well attended, and though I got to speak to many of the folks who came to offer their respects and farewells, I never made it outside to the patio, and I know there were many I missed. Hearing from his students was especially fulfilling. It is not often, as educators, that we have the opportunity to hear about the lasting impact we’ve had on a person’s professional life. In the case of Gene, that impact lives on in the students of his students as well.

We had a gathering back at our home for family and friends who could make it over, midweek and dinner hour. I was especially honored that two of our favorite nurses, Jamie and Shakkia were able to come as well. My niece Nancy’s family, the Mendoza’s, provided much of the food, and as usual, Gene’s friends and both of our families all chipped in to provide the rest. Jason told me before hand that we had enough tequila to get the Rolling Stones drunk. As the night wore on, we made a decent dent in that as well. Gene’s ipod once again provided the music, with many, many more hours left to play. The beans and rice and enchiladas, chicken carnitas, and guacamole are gone, but should you come by, and I hope you will, I’m quite sure there will be tequila for years to come, though Gene would offer you a cold beer first.

I was blessed to have my family with me for the entire month. My mom, Susan, Esther, Lawren and Christina were here for the week of the memorial. I can’t imagine how it could have happened without them, without Jason and Nancy, without Donald and Linda. Susan Nickerson and her family took Breezy for the night, so the doors were wide open for the first time ever. We don’t have many pictures, but we do have words, and as mentioned, I will be posting them as permissions come in. I’m now immersing myself in the grieving process, now that the busy-ness is over. I’ve saved all your cards to open slowly, to read what you’ve written to me in them and in the book. The business part of my life-changes nags at me, but I’ve not yet been able to do much. I keep reminding myself that I have the gift of time, still 5 weeks till work starts again. The weather has definitely been cooperating with grieving….once again very grey, very cool, not reaching 70, a gloom that is forecast to brighten a bit but not disappear too soon….a good reflection of the time I am in. Perhaps this will be the summer without summer in San Diego….but then again…August and September await us.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Gene’s San Diego Memorial Update

Just a few reminders about Wednesday's memorial:

Date: Wednesday, July 14th, 2010

Time: 3:30 p.m.

Location: Parma Payne Goodall Alumni Center

San Diego State University

55th Street and Hardy Avenue

San Diego, CA 92182

Parking is available at no charge in Parking Structure 5 (adjacent to the Alumni Center; enter from 55th Street).

Directions:

The easiest way to get there, I think, is from I-8 take Mission Gorge/ Fairmont exit. Go South on Fairmont, the second exit is Montezuma East. Go up Montezuma 3-4 lights to 55th St. When you make a left on 55th , the Parking Structure is on right, go in the last entrance. There will be signs for “Alumni Center Event Parking”, that’s us, an Alumni Center event. Whatever level for parking it indicates, parking on that level will be free. As you walk north out of parking structure, the grass field behind Parma Payne Goodall Center is what you see, just walk around to the front which is opposite, almost, Viejas Arena.

And just one more thing: Some people have asked if this is an event for faculty only. SDSU has been kind enough to provide the venue and any support we can imagine, but it is not a faculty-only event. The event is open to all; all are welcome! We’ll have time to mingle, and visit over refreshments on the patio after the formal part of the remembrance and celebration is over. Hope to see you there.

Also: Jason has updated his online gallery with a combination of his photos of the NM memorial and now Patty’s are added as well, so if you’ve not yet looked, or want another peek, here is the link again. If you click “slideshow” at the bottom, you can see all the photos in that format.

http://gallery.me.com/boomchikiboom#100044

Today would have been Gene’s 61st birthday. Mike and Eileen in Corrales are holding a birthday celebration so if you are in ABQ, and want to join them, contact Patty Dana at (505) 980-0578 for further info.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Gene's Eulogy / Obituary/ SD Memorial Info

Here is the eulogy that I wrote and delivered for Gene, at the San Juan Mission Church in Mimbres on June 27:

Gene, as many of you know, was among a unique group of people who were “born in space”, in Santa Rita, NM. Being the only son, life with five sisters prepared him for success in a predominantly female profession. He was molded early on by Luisa’s love and MP’s caring. He was a brother, a friend, an uncle, a spouse, a son, a brother-in-law, and a student, a wild, kind, curious, compassionate being.

Geno loved people, and yet he was a homebody, loving most to be at home with Breezy, and me, putzing in the yard, or at home on the farm, working up a sweat.

He was a musicologist, a bird-watcher, a lover of hawks and flowers, a consummate reader, a life-long Yankees fan, baseball his favorite sport. He was a gardener, a hiker, a reluctant traveler, and though he continued to insist that he wasn’t really a sailor, after 30 years with me, he was the best first mate I could possibly have and I don’t know that Symphony and I will be able to sail together much more without him.

Dr. Valles was a student of life, people and politics, sifting through multiple sources of information to digest and reflect on any evidence of peace, justice and morality. We shared our politics completely.

Eugenio was a loving, caring and responsible son, adored by MP and Luisa. Over these past six or seven years, Gene spent his New Mexico time with Luisa at Ft. Bayard, or helping MP in Hurley. He would find usually only 24 hours or so to spend at his most favorite spot on earth, No Cattle Company, always facilitated fully by Michael and Sharlene.

Although Gene could cruise comfortably with the girls personally and professionally, he loved his time with the boys. How many of us are lucky enough to have had a friend like Howie for 55 years? With Jerry and Joe not far behind, Terry and at least 3 Michaels, at least one of whom can be truly defined a soul mate. One of his best San Diego buds, Paul, can’t be here today, as he is supporting his wife as she too battles cancer. And although he and Jim have been friends for years, the level of bonding they experienced as Jim supported him on his journey through cancer, can’t be measured in words. Jim was, Gene said, his favorite caregiver. And all of us who know them are thinking that of course, as his spirit is enfolded in the wings of his mother, one arm is reaching out for the cold beers being cracked by Tommy and Mark.

Bean had some incredible karma that lasted him 60 years. Life just seemed to roll his way, whether it was the good car karma that I was able to share, the Caliente, The Red Rooster, he must have gotten that, along with his hands, from his dad. He was a good boy, I’ve been told, a “school boy”. The son of a mineworker, he found himself on a college track, first a math major at Western NMU. Drafted into the army during the Vietnam War, his karma found him doing time in El Paso, the resulting GI bill later paying for his education and helping us buy our first home.

Although drifting a wild bit after the army, and serving time at Roses Cantina among other watering holes, as young people are often want to do, it was his volunteer work at Southwest Services for the Handicapped that pointed him in the direction of Special Education as a career.

His friendship with Tom Foy Jr. was no small part of him being included as an original partner in No Cattle Company. After a few years of teaching at Silver High School, he moved to Albuquerque, returning to UNM where we met in 1975 while working on our Bachelor’s Degrees. He earned a Masters Degree in Special Education and was teaching in APS when he was invited and encouraged to enter the doctoral program, something he never consciously sought, making him an anomaly in higher education. He was a teacher of teachers who actually taught public school for 17 years. He was loved by colleagues and students alike, a thinker, non-judgmental, caring and motivating, providing avenues into the teaching profession for students like himself, from diverse backgrounds, often second-language learners and first generation college attendees. But for sure, he preferred, when asked, not “Dr. Valles”, but ever humble, “just Gene”.

Although his career unfolded seemingly effortlessly (not counting the dissertation writing completed thanks to the encouragement of Dr. Anne Tafoya), he did actively pursue the love of his life, a seemingly unlikely blond-haired, blue-eyed beach girl from New York.

After a 4 year long-distance romance with breaks and interventions (stories there), we both returned to UNM in 1980 and were married in Tennessee in 1981, beginning the official part of our 35 years together. And, as Gene will have two memorials, (the next in San Diego on July 14) we also had two weddings. We married in Tennessee on Dec. 27, spent our honeymoon driving West on I-40 (but enjoyed many, many great trips later to make up for the lack of relaxation on that one!), to a New Year’s Eve Party at the Lions Club in Bayard, put together by the same friends, in the same way that the party we are about to attend will be.

Family or friend contact lapsed or lost did not mean love lapsed or lost for Gene. And friends usually meant a party, we’ll tell more of those stories later.

Gene’s sisters tell me he was a Mama’s boy and that must be where he learned to love. And love he did- life, family, his friends, our cats: Wolfie, Kitty Litter, and Breezy, and me. He deeply loved the desert southwest and a particular corner of it called No Cattle Company.

One of our greatest lessons through this terrible journey, where Gene suffered SO greatly, was LOVE, and receiving all the love that sustained us. The love and gratitude he received from his students was often what choked him up, as he clearly cared so much for them.

So the greatest lesson, as all the prophets and God have taught, truly is LOVE. The love Gene had for me, I’ve always known, is the greatest gift one can receive in life, even in its less than perfect forms. Gene is now PURE LOVE, no longer embodied, his love lives on in us all. Remember and reflect on his love every time you enjoy the beauty of flowers, bite into a perfect crisp fresh apple, or pop that first, or fourth beer.

Gene told me in his last days that he was sorry he disappointed all those people who prayed, who sent energy and love and begged the universe for his survival in human form. I told him, NO; he was a model of courage, of tenacity, and of hope in spite of tremendous odds. He was a warrior who fought through trials beyond imagination.

God’s plan for Gene is different than the one we wanted. But he lives on in us all. Each time we meet, each hug we exchange, the love and energy of Gene will be rekindled. Keep the web of love, energy, prayer, hope and reflection alive. Gene is part of it, and will continue to connect us all. God will bless him, this I believe. Thank you for being here.


Here is the obituary that I wrote with help from friends and family and which will appear in the Silver City Daily Press, his hometown newspaper:

Gene Valles

July 13, 1949- June 23, 2010

Eugeñio Calderon Valles was born to Manuel and Luisa Valles in Santa Rita, NM, on July 13, 1949. He was raised and attended school in Hurley NM, the only son among six children. He learned the ways of horses from his dad, and began his lifetime love of baseball as a Little Leaguer. A high school wrestler, he graduated from Cobre HS in 1967, and attended WNMU before serving in the US Army from 1971-1973.

He found his career direction in volunteer work for Southwest Services for the Handicapped, and went on to earn a BA and MA degree from UNM in Special Education. He spent 17 years as a public school teacher, including 4 years at Silver HS, 1976-1980, where he also coached Cross-Country Track.

He married his college sweetheart, Gail, in 1981. They both taught in Albuquerque Public Schools, and Gene earned his PhD in Special Education from UNM in 1992. Since 1993 he had been living in San Diego, CA, working as a professor, a teacher of teachers, at San Diego State University. He returned to his home in the Mimbres Valley whenever he could.

Dr. Valles focused his career on helping those who learn differently. During his tenure at SDSU, he particularly worked to provide access to a career in Special Education for students like himself, from diverse backgrounds, often second-language learners and first-generation college attendees.

Gene was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia on Jan. 15, 2010. Prayers were answered as he found a donor for a Bone Marrow Transplant. However, he died from treatment-related complications 60 days after transplant. He battled as a true warrior, determined, though wounded.

A celebration of Gene’s life took place on June 27, with a funeral service at the San Juan Mission Church, in the Mimbres Valley. A memorial will also be held in San Diego in mid-July. He was preceded in death by his mother, Luisa and nephews Michael and Daniel Morales, and brother-in-law, David Delgado. He is survived by his father, Manuel Pacheco (MP) Valles, age 97, of Hurley; his wife, Gail, of San Diego, and her family; sisters Emilia Morales of Colton, CA, Genevieve (Guera) Jimenez of Glendale, AZ, Teresa Delgado of Kempner, TX, and Maria Dolores Tovar and Victoria Valles-Mora of Albuquerque. He was blessed as well with many, many wonderful nieces and nephews.

For anyone wishing to honor his memory, donations may be made to any of the following:

Gene Valles Memorial Scholarship Fund

Checks payable to:

The Campanile Foundation

San Diego State University

5500 Campanile Drive

San Diego CA 92182-8030

Leukemia and Lymphoma Society

http://www.leukemia-lymphoma.org

888-773-9958

Or donations made in Gene’s name to the:

San Juan Mission Church

HC 71 Box 1377

San Lorenzo, NM 88041

And finally, the information again on the SDSU Memorial:

Date: Wednesday, July 14th, 2010

Time: 3:30 p.m.

Location: Parma Payne Goodall Alumni Center

San Diego State University

55th Street and Hardy Avenue

San Diego, CA 92182

Parking is available at no charge in Parking Structure 5 (adjacent to the Alumni Center; enter from 55th Street).

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

New Mexico Memorial Photos

Our incredible nephew, Jason Estrada, who was my lifeline during Gene's hospitalization, visiting him almost every day, took these incredible photos of the New Mexico Memorial. For those of you who've not been to the farm, you'll get a glimpse. Although you may not know all the friends and family, his slideshow captures the essence of a beautiful ceremony. You can download or add to it or just view it. Thanks, Jas! Patty Dana just sent more so I'll be adding a link to those as well, or combining, but here is a first look:

Monday, July 5, 2010

Safely Home in SD

We made the desert crossing safely on the fourth of July, and my mom, my sister Susan and I, are all back in SD. Breezy joined us last night, coming from the excellent care of Susan, Steve and Rachel. She spent some time looking for Gene, as she could smell the farm on us, and on our stuff, and that smell always used to mean Gene was back. My sister Esther returns this week, and we'll get to work planning Gene's SD Memorial on July 14, one day after what would have been his 61st birthday.
The time at the farm was deep and sad and sweet with friends and family. We had a perfect celebration of Gene's life, New Mexico style. I'll post the photos and a bit about them as soon as I collect them from Patty and Jason. We filled the little church in San Juan and ate lots of good New Mexico style enchiladas, and more, back at the farm. Oh yea, and a good tequila toast too.
Thanks to all of you who came, who contributed, who shared stories and tears, and offered your condolences. We planned so carefully, it was such a great group effort. One of the many things that especially touched me was that one of Gene's high school friends, Sam Baca, now a funeral director himself, came just as a friend, and helped facilitate the memorial in the church, including walking me out of the church. Just one of many examples of folks whose lives Gene has touched, and for whose touch I am so grateful.
For those of you still needing to mourn and celebrate Gene, the details for the San Diego State Memorial are here on the blog. I'll continue to post.